THE NIGERIAN WOMAN AND THE REAL MAN (TEST-THE-TERONE) BY Sally

THE NIGERIAN WOMAN AND THE REAL MAN

The Nigerian woman is like every other woman. She has all the appealing body parts and her anatomy is definitely female but she surprisingly has more to offer.

The Nigerian woman is raised to love, obey, respect, satisfy and nurture her man. From the time her little feet are able to move around and she can use her hands as well, her mother teaches her how to take care of the home. She starts from serving her father and brothers and uncles and at some point when she becomes old enough, her mother leaves the running of the household in her hands. Now, I know we’re in a modern age and westernization has affected us a lot but the females in Nigeria are still expected to serve the males no matter their upbringing, religion or even social status.

The Nigerian woman grows into learning how to cater to the emotional, physical, psychological and sexual wishes of her man. So what is the man’s duty, in return? The obvious answer would be, to provide her needs, be it financially or materially because the general opinion is if you give a Nigerian woman money, then you have made her happy. Seriously, I can’t fault anyone who believes that because of the obvious lifestyles of many female folk today. But let’s just be honest here, a woman needs much more than that. She wants communication, connection and emotional intimacy. The need to be loved and heard and understood never really goes away. Women will always put aside the clothes and jewelry and shoes and find somewhere to cry if they’re not loved. They will always envy that other woman whose man treats her like gold and not a commodity on a stand. They will always find a way to seek emotional gratification when the finer things leave them feeling empty. Yes, more than you know, the Nigerian woman has a heart.

The biggest complain women have today is that Nigerian men are very unromantic. They face love with the same cutthroat manner they face their businesses. Romantic gestures to them are not necessarily acts of love but prelude to sex. Some of them are so caught up in their manliness and ability to be turned on by a woman and act on it, that they believe it is all it takes to be a man. Well, I hate to burst your bubble (if you’re one of said males) that it takes more than a full dose of testosterone to become what a woman needs. Ever wondered why certain men are easily taken in by the female folk? They steal the hearts of not just the girl with the full curves but the frustrated woman selling soft drinks on a tray, the mother-in-law from hell and even the veiled Muslim sister who cannot look into your eyes without bending her head. They have simply learnt the complex language of the Nigerian woman, who surprisingly does not demand much at the end of the day.

All she wants from a world that has obviously lost it is a genuine man. To put it in our language here, she wants a real man.

Who is a real man? Below, I have defined him in very simple terms.

A Real Man Doesn’t Sweat The Small Stuff

The way guys act when they are confronted with trivial issues is something I have always admired. To them, if it’s not affecting their pockets, stomachs and erogenous zones, why bother? What really is the sense in busting your nuts over something that is total BS. There is nothing wrong with a man expressing his emotions once in a while but when he allows them get the best of his thought process, then his estrogen level needs to be checked. Men enjoy a good laugh any day and at their own expense! You’re as short as M.I, someone pokes at your pot belly, your ex calls you broke ‘cause you didn’t buy her a Peruvian… whatever it is, it’s not worth your sweat.

A Real Man Is A Grown Man

There is nothing as off-putting as a man who just would not grow up. Being a man is all about responsibility. Adam was not given the task of screwing the lesser beings in the garden but of taking care of them. Even if a guy has no one to be responsible for, he should be responsible for himself. Proven, women mature faster than men and it takes a longer time for a man who is age mates with a woman to understand the concepts she has already fully grasped, but that doesn’t mean he should go about his life acting like he’s an overgrown baby. Mature men control their emotions and respect the feelings of others. I hate it when I hear men tell their women that the best cook is their mother and no one else will ever cook like her. That is babytalk. Your mother breastfed you, raised you with her tantalizing meals but now you’re a grown man. It is time to create your own life and swing on your own branch of the tree.

A Real Man Is A Gentleman

Opening doors, pulling out chairs, asking a lady what she wants, giving her a helping hand… these things never grow old. “I no be gentleman at all” should never apply when dealing with a woman. A gentleman is not a weakling; he’s a sensitive, kind and passionate soul wrapped in a rock-solid heart and muscular exterior. He has exquisite taste and proper etiquette. He is in control of his temper and his tongue. He respects his woman and generally everyone else around him. In today’s language, he’s a big boy, and it has nothing to do with his paycheck because a gentleman never shows off how much he’s got. He has high moral values and does not go broadcasting his affairs to anyone.  He is not afraid to bare his heart and can easily let his guard down, knowing it doesn’t mean he’s less in any way. Gentlemen are not stupid. No, they are the wisest of the bunch. Wonder why that that girl behind the counter shouted on Guy A and blushed at Guy B the moment he opened his mouth? It was all in a manner of speaking – literally. He spoke and she was mesmerised by how only a “hello” left her feeling all woman.  Refinement and simple courtesy always score big. And finally, a real gentleman does not give and expect something in return; for the sake of his own self-image, it is simply beneath him to go that low.

A Real Man Is Faithful

Big, strong, reliable. We all know that one. But truth is, we hardly ever see him. He’s most times big and strong but not reliable. He says I will be home by nine but comes back the next day. He promises heaven and earth but he’s hell to live with. A faithful man should be like the sun that rises every morning. To the general populace, especially guys, it’s in a man’s nature to whore around. After all, Solomon had a thousand women and was the world’s wisest. I totally understand that argument but the women were the beginning of Solomon’s foolery and what also ended him, as the Bible told it. For those people who are disillusioned, it is a lot of work to cheat than to stay faithful. So keep it simple and stay with one woman at a time. No one knows what goes around these days. HIV/AIDS is just one of them. Ask the man who found himself dead in a dumpster because he screwed the wrong girl.

A Real Man Has Real Money

Money talks and the poor guy gets the boot. Women love to know that their man can provide their basic needs. I am not even going to start bashing those who buy their women expensive stuff; it’s their own prerogative. If you have it and feel she’s worth it, what’s the big hoo-ha? If you don’t have it but can afford a nice pair of earrings once in a while, why not? The point is, earn a living and save some money so you can invest in your tomorrow and enjoy your today. Real money doesn’t have to be in millions or even hundreds of thousands. Real men with real money are blessed men who use their little or much faithfully, and have no added sorrows.

A Real Man Knows How To Work The V

It is said that a man does not multitask, that once he sets his mind on something, he gives it his full attention until he’s done, so how come he is always in such a hurry when he is making love? What is the rush? It is also said that men love adventure, so why on earth is the woman’s body not a new challenge or a voyage worth undertaking? Seriously, why make so much noise about getting there and when you finally get there, you just want to get off? Thank God for the internet with all the info it gives to help the one minute man. It would be atrocious in this day and age for a guy to fail to satisfy his woman.

A Real Man R-E-S-P-E-C-T-S

I am not talking about respecting the womenfolk. I am talking about a man putting a value on himself and making sure he doesn’t lower it for any female. Yes, you’re a man, you have needs and they have to be met, doesn’t mean you have to go after everything that struts by with a vagina. Set your rules and stick by them. Quit the tactless jokes and inappropriate pick-up lines. Have class. Quit settling. Quit being a pushover. Band wagoners always fall off the track because it’s never easy keeping up with the Joneses. The Joneses know why they are the Joneses and are happy being the Joneses, so what is an Olamide or a Hassan doing in their wagon? There is nothing as attractive as a man who stands out in the crowd. He is always exceptional even when his quirks are obvious. Be confident and lastly, cast not your pearls to the pig or she might turn around and rend you.

A Real Man Takes The Lead

Today, we’re in a civilised age with women taking the roles of men, doing better what men do and generally proving that you don’t need to have an Adam’s apple to be an Adam. But the problem is, if it’s not Panadol, it is not the same thing as panadol. Men who know their place, never give their power away. They might lend it out temporarily but a real man always leads the pack. They do not bully, abuse or manhandle people in their care because being the head sometimes means stooping low to carry others on your shoulders. So my point here is, if you’re in a relationship, be the head, even though, we all know what makes the head turn.

A Real Man Dresses To Impress

Finally, this might sound like the most trivial point but it is equally important. I love that guys can just pick something off the rack or bed and slip into it with no worries over whether it matches their shoes or jeans but what makes that attractive is having a wardrobe that looks classy enough to be casually sexy. I am not referring to men that fight for mirror time, wear their girlfriend’s powder and super-skinny jeans and in the end come out looking like they went through a color-riot, gay makeover. And I am not also referring to those men who still wear baggy jeans, deep v-neck shirts and gold necklaces. The whole idea is looking exquisite and manly, and at the same being comfortable. Women are excused when they feel pain in their dressing but a man’s wardrobe should be unrestricted and easy but stylish. As a guy, you love what you see when a woman dresses to impress you. I think it’s only fair if you make the same effort to impress her back.

 

To wrap it up, a real man, as a said earlier is a real man and he can’t fake it. He is not apologetic for who he is as part of the male species and enjoys his masculinity immensely. He loves sports, hangs out with other guys, does not have too many words in his vocabulary, is not crazy about nurturing, has no idea what it means to multitask and unashamedly appreciates the beauty of the opposite sex whenever they walk by. In conclusion, when he loves his woman, he does so unrepentantly and that is simply what a Nigerian woman needs.

Are you a real man?

 

© Sally

Truth Be Told 2 (In Pursuit of Kyenpia)

Strange hands were working my back when I woke up. My head faced down, I was staring at the ugliest toes ever. I sprang up and found myself face to face with one of the Malaysian masseuses that worked at the hotel’s spa. She said nothing but looked at me with questioning eyes.

“Get me my clothes,” I ordered and she hurried out of the massage room. I picked my phone, checked the date and time and waited for her to return. She walked in and handed me my clothes and walked out. Fully dressed, I picked my phone again and recorded my first entry for the day.

“18th May 2010. Time: 4:13pm. Personality: Daniel. Emotional state: normal. Physical state: healthy. Psychological: we’ll have to wait and see. Woke up in a spa. Almost got grossed out by ugly toes. First thought: Kyenpia. I can still taste her lips. On my way to see Sugar. I hope to end this.”

I found my way out of the spa and headed to my suite where I showered and changed. In no time I was driving into town to see Sugar.

There was traffic and it took me longer than it should have but I caught her at home. According to the memories I retrieved from Leonel who knew her more than I did, she hardly went anywhere on Mondays.

“Hello son,” she said with a smile when she saw me. “I can get used to calling you that.”

She was in her kitchen, trying to fix herself a cocktail. I pulled a stool and sat down. It was very difficult being in the same room with her as recollections of a terrible nature kept playing themselves over in my head but I kept my resentment in the back burner. She switched on the TV and the seven o’clock news was on. The top headline was about the man who was murdered at the Kiss and Share auction. He was no ordinary person, a politician from the ruling party, the governorship candidate chosen for the 2012 elections. Nothing was going to stop him from becoming governor. Nothing but Sugar.

“Why did you do it?” I asked her.

She smiled at me and stirred her drink with a fork. “Accept me into your family with open arms and I will tell you everything you ever wanted to know about politics in this State and how it is run.”

“I don’t give a rat’s ass about politics in this state and how it’s run, I just wanted to know why you almost got me killed—you and your gang—when you and I had unfinished business.”

She laughed and hoisted herself on the kitchen table and looked at me.

“You want to know why I did what I did?” she played with the rim of the wine glass with her little finger and looked at me. “Somebody wanted you dead. And seriously, with the money that person offered me, I could have killed you that night but I remembered our deal and how badly I needed to get into the captain’s inner circle and how only you could get me in, so I let you live. I was the one who called the hotel’s paramedics to get you. Honestly, I didn’t know Stella had it in for you like that or I would have stopped her from kicking you with those heels. That last part happened so fast and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I am sorry, handsome. Just girls having fun.” She leaned forward. “But before that night, I have heard about your…abilities. I just wanted to try it out for myself. And I must say, I was very impressed. You took on five of us. Many men pass out after the third.

“Who was the person that wanted me dead?” I asked.

She sat straight. “Oh, that I can’t tell. That person wants every member of your family gone. Alexia knows the person. You should ask her. In short, I think she’s taken an independent contract to do the job but she’s trying to chicken out.”

“Zia? Zia has been paid to kill me?”

“Mnh-mnh,” Sugar shook her head, “not you. Your father.”

“So why did you send those two guys to kill me?”

She took a sip from her cocktail. “They were not there to hurt you but bring you to me. I wanted to thank you personally for connecting me with the captain. Your plan worked perfectly. Let me tell you how it went,” she said in excitement. “When I got the tip from Zia that Stella was running a coke deal right under my nose without telling me, I quickly got my guys to follow Stella. They were on the scene during the exchange and saw how everything went down. After that, I instructed them to follow her and retrieve the fifty bricks and bring them back to me. At that point, I didn’t know it belonged to the captain but I kept it as insurance for a rainy day. You know, stuff like that, you just don’t sell it. It always comes in handy for a good, under the table type of transaction when you don’t want money traced by the SS. So, two days later, who walks in through my front doors but the captain himself! He wanted to know who had balls enough to steal his stash right from under his nose. He wasn’t convinced that I wasn’t involved with Stella, and I used that to my advantage. I told him I was holding his stash because I wanted something in return. Never mind the details of what he and I discussed but today I am his fiancée.”

That was not how I actually planned to introduce her to the captain but I didn’t tell her that.

“But you do know he’s using you, right? Even if he marries you, you still will not get into his inner caucus. The people in that circle are childhood friends he grew up with, people whom he’s bled with and are willing to die with him.”

Sugar’s smile faded and she finished her cocktail with one gulp. “Playing politics in this State is for people in the small league. The captain plays nationally and that is where my sights are and he will get me there whether he likes it or not. He left his party to get into the ruling party just because of my connection. He owes me.”

Now, I laughed. “If the captain wanted to get into your party, he could have done that without you. The question you should ask yourself is why did he use you to get in?”

“I beg your pardon Leo? Do you know who the Bakares are?”

“I do.”

“My family literally owns Lagos State, so be careful with your implications. With all the national connections the Igwes have, they are still not Yorubas and do not run this town. It still belongs to us and the captain needed me to get in.”

“And now that he has gotten in, what other favors, apart from the obvious have you helped him with?”

“Look at the news!” she turned to the TV. “Who do you think is responsible for what happened to that guy? Of course, my dear Titilayo is carted away to face the brutal arm of the law and that’s sad but that is the only way I knew I could infuse the captain’s candidate in. My brother is pissed, naturally but he will get over it because the new person is the best guy for the job.”

I stared at her for an endless moment. All anger in me had died down. Funny how I had no more fight in me when all the missing pieces fell into place. I accepted that I was just a pawn in the game and let it be. I didn’t even care that she was getting married to the captain. In fact, he needed a woman in his life and didn’t deserve anyone good. Sugar was just perfect but if she was expecting me to warm up to her, it was never going to happen.

“So, now that you have served your own end of the deal, what do you want me to do for you? Name it. Even up to half of my kingdom!” she laughed at her own silliness.

I stood up. “I want to know who is trying to kill my family.”

“I’m sorry, Leonel but I can’t tell you that. It’s best you don’t know.”

I said nothing more and left the house. I drove back to the hotel and locked myself in my office, buried under a ton of unfinished work. When I emerged, I realized I still had time to catch up with Kyenpia before her show started. I turned on my iPad and connected to the radio station. She wasn’t the one on air but I knew she was in the building. I dialed in and waited for them to put me through to her. A minute later, she walked in and took my call, off air.

“Hi Love Doctor,” she said with a smile.

“Hello Kyenpia. How are you?”

“Good! How was your weekend?”

“Not so good after you ran off with your boyfriend.”

“Ishi? Ishi’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a friend. Sorry about what happened sha, but I’m glad I left. He told me the kind of thing that usually happens after the Kiss and Share. Is it true?”

“Yeah. Some go beyond the kiss and take the share literally.”

“Wow. Thank God I left. Did you stay back?”

“No. I disappeared a few minutes after you did. You’re looking ravishing today.”

She blushed and stared into one of the cameras. “Thank you.”

“So, tell me about that kiss.”

“That kiss?” she laughed. “You want to know about it? Err…I think I have to go now. I’ll be on air in the next seven minutes. Bye!”

She hung up and disappeared from the studio. I laughed to myself, picked my iPad and some documents and headed to the penthouse. My bedroom was freezing cold, just the way I wanted it. I turned on the radio in the room and the surround system took me right into studio with her. I listened as she began her show; she talked a lot, played some songs and finally decided to share an email that needed my attention.

“Dear Love Doctor,” she began, “my name is so and so. I am in my twenties and still single. I do have a boyfriend though, but he lives in a different town and I only get to see him once a month. So many people say long distance relationships don’t work but I am crazy about my boyfriend and so far, we are still together. But just the other day, I met someone else and something happened that I’ll not share because I do not kiss and tell. But what happened felt so good. It felt like it was the right thing to do and honestly, I have never done that thing with anyone in that way before. Love Doctor, I’m still crazy about my boyfriend but now, I can’t forget what happened between me and this guy. It keeps replaying in my head. What do you think I should do? I really don’t know him but I feel like I have known him all my life. What should I do?”

I burst out laughing. The email was from her to me. She was putting me on the spot.

“When we get back,” she continued, “we will have the Love Doctor tell us what he thinks about that email. Don’t go away.”

I wasted no time in calling her and she took my call.

“Hi Love Doctor. Please, stay on the line while the commercial runs.”

“Okay.”

We got back on air in less than a minute and she put on her headphones and spoke into the mic.

“Kyenpia here and you’re In Pursuit of Love. The Love Doctor is also with us. Hello Love Doctor.”

“Hello Kyenpia. Good evening, Lagos. I was just telling Kyenpia a while ago how lovely she looked. In fact, I think there’s something exceptional about her this evening and I don’t know what. You will have to tell us later, though.”

“Okay. So, what advice do you have for this girl who did this thing with this strange guy she hardly knows and now, can’t stop thinking about him?”

“Wow, this is an interesting case. First, why is she hiding what she did with this guy?”

“Obviously, she doesn’t kiss and tell.”

“Oh, well, there isn’t much to say here but that she should stick with her boyfriend.”

“Why?”

“Because she has no idea who this new guy really is, obviously, and why throw caution to the wind just because of one encounter? I’m a firm believer of fate. If it’s meant to be, it will be but for now, she should stay with her man until her relationship runs out of steam.”

“But what if she really wants to know this new guy?”

“And what if this new guy is not going to be around for her? What if he’s not all he says he is? What if he’s not ready for either a commitment or even a casual fling? What if what happened between them was just a onetime thing?”

I cursed myself for what I was doing to her but it had to be done.

“So you’re saying she should forget about the guy?”

“Yeah. She should. If you’re listening, stick with your boyfriend, lady. That encounter you had might have brought tears to your eyes but some guys are players and they just know how to give a woman what she wants.”

“Okay, you heard him. Stay with your man. Thank you for stopping by Love Doctor. We’ll take another commercial and when we get back, we’ll find out what women don’t want you to know about their choice of underwear.”

She went off air and spoke to me.

“I should forget that kiss like it never happened?”

I shut my eyes tightly and painfully. “Kyenpia, I enjoyed that kiss even more than you did but I’m going away. I…am returning to London.”

“Yeah, my boss said so. I thought she was kidding.”

“Kyenpia…there might be another chance for us in the future but now is a bad time.”

“I know,” she laughed lightly. “For all I know, you could be a serial killer.”

I laughed. “I can’t stop thinking about your lips and I doubt I ever will. But I don’t want you to forget me. And I don’t want you stop doing what you do—helping people, doing this show and basically, causing kasala in the world of men.”

She laughed for a long time.

“I’ll miss you but will continue the show from London till Friday.”

“Okay.”

“Thanks for sharing this part of your life with me, though. I had fun. One day, we’ll meet when nothing holds us back. Now, there’s too much baggage on both sides and we don’t want that.”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “I have to go back on air.”

“Okay.”

“Thanks.”

“No, thank you, Kyenpia.”

“Good night.”

She ended the call. I leaned on my pillow and watched her until she signed off and left the building. I didn’t sleep a wink that night. At exactly 4am, my secretary appeared with my driver and the hotel’s admin manager. While the driver carried my luggage out, the admin manager and secretary took last minute instructions from me on how I wanted the office run in the next month. What they didn’t know was I was going to be absent until the end of the year. I was going to a mental clinic in London where my aunt worked and I wasn’t leaving there till I was completely cured.

As I sat in the backseat and headed to the airport, I braced myself for an unknown future. Kyenpia was more than I had bargained for, she was going to turn me into a better man. She had set me in pursuit of love. I owed it to her to see the journey to the end.

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Truth Be Told (In Pursuit Of Kyenpia) by Sally

When David poured that insanely freezing bucket of water over me, I sprang up dazed and without thinking, stumbled towards him. He grabbed me by the neck and had me in a headlock.

“Abeg, stop it!” I complained and aimed my fist for his balls but he moved away, put one leg behind me and I was down to the floor.

“Okay, game over,” I said, knowing I couldn’t overpower him. For the umpteenth time, I wondered why I didn’t join the army to get the type of training my brothers got. They always bullied me.

“Oya!” he gave me a hand and pulled me up and hugged me but I pushed him off.

“No dey try dat kain rubbish with me!” I warned him and for the first time, really looked around me. “What type of place is this?”

“I asked myself the same question,” David answered with a smile. You don’t know where you are, do you?”

“You brought me here?”

“Me? Rudeboy brought me here. You have been in this place for months. You basically run the hotel from here.”

I ran my hand over my face, “oh, that’s messed up.” I began fishing around for my phones and when I found them on the bed, they were both dead, soaked from David’s childish, birthday prank. He shrugged when I showed him his handiwork.

“Use my own.” He threw his phone to me and I dialed my secretary to come and clear my valuables from the house and also Rudeboy to see me immediately. As I ended the call, I noticed the girl from yesterday standing by the door—obviously just waking up—looking from David to me with a confused expression.

“Hi, I’m David,” David turned to her with a smile.

“Yvonne,” she shook his hand. “Or just I… Ivy.” She was still confused. “Leo, you’re a twin?”

“Obviously.”

She nodded slowly. “You never told me.”

I also never told you I was mentally unbalanced but you figured that out on your own. Clap for Ivy.

So, you’re leaving?” she asked, not looking too happy.

“Yeah, I’m leaving right now. You live here too?”

She gave me a funny look briefly and then the sad eyes returned. “I’ll miss you.”

Okay, what did that mean? I will miss you as a roommate or I’ll miss you as someone I slept with?

I looked at her fully, assessing her statistics. I found her just okay. She was not my type.

“Thanks for everything, sha,” she said. “The money came in yesterday morning. I wanted to thank you but you were not at home, so…”

“You’re welcome.” I didn’t bother to ask her how much. Later on, when I went through my accounts and discovered two million naira missing, I almost choked myself to death.

“Call me once in a while,” Ivy said with a smile and her normal features transformed to something stunning.”

I looked at her again and wasn’t so sure Daniel had not slept with her. We were both suckers for dazzling smiles.

“So, how far with today, nah, wannabe?” David asked. “Any plans?”

I gave him a wicked smile and he knew whatever I had up my sleeves were not going to go down well with his wife if she ever found out. But the truth was, she never was going to find out.

**********

It was a long day that found David tipsy and enjoying the city lights from my balcony back at the hotel. I had not done anything bad to him but almost got him killed three times. This was my own birthday; last year, he did worse to me.

“What’s up with you and that radio chick?” David asked me and I looked at him with a smile.

“Kyenpia?”

“Yeah, that one. You have been featuring on her show.”

I had no idea  but I said nothing.

“You really like her?”

No, Daniel does.  All the same, she struck us both somewhere deep.

“I’m crazy about Kyenpia. I think she’s the one.”

“She’s Ishi’s wife,” David said curtly and looked at me with a warning. I never did understand the relationship David and Ishi shared. Ishi was his other twin.

“She’s his friend,” I stated emphatically.

“Leo, Kyenpia cannot be one of your playthings. Ishi loves that girl. You don’t want to go down that road.”

“And who says I’m not in love with her too?”

“Daniel loves her. Not you. Until Daniel surfaces for real and decides to be the man that he is supposed to be, I advise you to stay away from her.”

I drew sideways and looked at David in annoyance. He had no right to butt in my issues and I told him that.

“You don’t want another family wahala on your head over this girl. Let her go, Leo.”

“Let her go? Where is this coming from? Did Ishi send you to tell me because I want to drive to his place now and stuff his mouth with my foot. What’s the whole drama surrounding the issue? I like the girl. I can’t stop thinking about her, day and night. No woman has ever done that to me. I see Kyenpia and I want to be a better man.”

“Then be a better man! Take your chances, go to her and tell her how you feel! Stop joking around because when you play those games, you’re hurting not just another person, but yourself! Yes, physically you can handle anything. You’re tough but you’re an emotional and psychological disaster waiting to happen. Leo,” he lowered his voice, “you think you’re strong but you’re not. That is why you switch from time to time because you never know how to handle pressure when it hits you. You run away and hide like a little child; it’s as if you’re trapped in some part of your childhood. One minute, you’re all grown and the next, you’re like the average teenager with hormones all over the place. You have to stop. You’re destroying yourself. That part of you called Daniel is the real you. He wants to live, he wants to come out. He’s the one who loves Kyenpia but you’re not allowing him stay long enough to turn your world around. He wants to be you but you don’t want to be him because Spirit still controls you. You’re still afraid of his voice and threats and each time you want to break free, he takes you back to those times he caged your little mind as a child. Spirit shouldn’t have that power. You need to know that he is just a shadow of the captain and you have to completely erase him. Grow up, wannabe. I miss my brother. I miss you insanely. I want Daniel back, but first Leonel, you have to go.”

I was silent for a long time. Everything he said was right. But it did not sink in. I took his words and stored them in my memory for later. I would come back to them when I had the time. At that moment, those words were not for me. I was in serious denial.

David and I gisted some more and later visited our mom at the fountain. He didn’t hold back his tears. To him, she put him to sleep twenty-five years ago and never came back. He didn’t have the chance to say goodbye. Her disappearance ate him more than it did me. They had a very tight bond. I knew I should tell him the truth but my alliance was with the captain.

Later that night, when I got back to my suite and had a hot shower, I turned on my iPad and logged into a particular IP address on the net. Once I got in, I retrieved recorded footage gotten from live video feed taken from my entire suite. I had no idea what to expect since I had been away for a long time but I wasn’t prepared for the shocking footage that met my eyes when I rewound back to the point I left off. As I sat there watching what Sugar and her friends did to me, I didn’t know whether to cry or to thank God for somehow keeping me alive. I lifted my shirt and my fingers felt the scars on my side. I hadn’t paid much attention to them earlier but now it all made sense. I reached for the new phone I just bought and fumbled around with the buttons. Straightaway, it dialed Sugar. She didn’t answer the first time but when I dialed again, she answered me with a sleepy voice.

“What do you want, Leonel?”

“Nice one, Sugar,” I said. “It was not in the plan.”

I imagined her getting off her bed, probably to stay out of earshot from the person she was in bed with.

“What was not part of the plan?” she asked.

“We need to talk. It seems our deal went awry.”

She paused and then finally burst out laughing. “I see what is happening. Somebody is finally awake and realizes he can’t play the game of the big boys.”

“We need to talk.”

“We have nothing to talk about Leonel.”

“I’m on my way,” I said.

I heard her muffled voice; she was talking to someone.

“Okay, you can come.”

The phone beeped off and I hurriedly dressed into something. Sugar’s place wasn’t far and was even shorter because the streets were virtually empty. In a couple of hours, Lagos wakes up to a new day of mundane, ferocious race for survival, a race against time. I wondered if it was worth it sometimes and that’s the problem with people like us who look at life from a glasshouse and not a peephole. We never really quite understand the rat race because we are larger animals in the food chain (or so we like to think). Excuse my digression.

Sugar’s gateman let me in and some guard frisked me at the front door before I walked in. The house was quiet and dark but I could see the reflection of the swimming pool cast over a massive painting of a half-naked man on the wall on my left. On my right was a staircase that led upstairs. I took double steps up. It was obvious she wanted to meet me in her private parlor since she hadn’t come down to meet me.

“I’m here!” I heard her say and saw her standing at her bedroom door. So far, in the short time I knew her, I had successfully escaped her sexual claws (well apart from that unholy night).

“Tired of hunting me?” she laughed and her heavy breasts without a bra bounced all over the place. Very unattractive. I closed my eyes briefly to banish the image of them bare but I was unsuccessful. The horrific frame of her nakedness from the rape video was still etched in my mind.

“Come in,” she said.

“No, I’d rather stay here.”

“Don’t worry Leo, I’m not going to rape you,” she laughed again. “Come in.”

“I just said no.”

“Come,” she walked to me and dragged me. At that point I was like if anything happened to me again, I deserved it. She led me into her room and it was dark like the rest of the house. I feared that she had all her gang members hiding in corners, ready to spring an attack on me.

“Turn on the lights, darling.”

At first I thought she was talking to me but when the lights went on and I saw the captain lying on her bed only in his boxers…

Wtf?

Contrary to what David said earlier, I was no kid. I knew when a man had needs that had to be met and for a man the captain’s age to be around someone like Sugar, he had to satisfy that craving. Sugar is called Sugar because she is sweet. Granted, she is on the fat side but she has the full cushion for the pushing. Trust Yoruba ladies and their behinds. So I understood the captain’s needs but to bring me up to their lust nest was unsexy.

“Hi, son,” he said.

Son? Why son? Why not Leonel or Spirit? What was this meeting about?

“Should I tell him or do you want to?” Sugar asked the captain.

“What’s…there to tell me?” I asked cautiously.

“We’re getting married!” For all she was worth, the weight, the braless boobs and bleached stretchmarks, Sugar was bouncing up and down excitedly like a twenty-five year old. I glared at the captain. Did he know this same woman screwed my life almost to oblivion? Of course, he had to know, yet he smiled at me with that tongue-in-cheek smile I hated so much. He was the beginning and end of the word ‘perversion’.

“Say hello to your new mother, son.”

Son, again?

“Welcome her to the family. I know everyone else would be pulling their hairs at this turn of events but I need you on my side. I need you to know you’re supporting me. Of course, it’s all political but Sugar is my guilty pleasure.”

“Let bygones be bygones, Leo. Your father has forgiven me for what I did to you. You should too. And I want to thank you for bringing us together.”

I didn’t know my mouth was hanging open until I felt saliva come to my lips. I swallowed. They both were looking at me in anticipation of what I had to say but I was speechless. How long their relationship had been going on, I had no idea but I blamed myself. Why? I freaking did not know. I badly wanted to retrieve my memory cards from my destroyed phones to find out what trails Daniel had left for me to follow. As it was, there were just too many holes. Why was Sugar thanking me for bringing them together? She and I had a deal before I disappeared and I never had the chance to see it through before she molested me. Did Daniel continue with the deal or did he go for revenge instead? I doubt that he sought revenge because if he did, Sugar would have been out of our lives. I needed answers and I needed them desperately.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” the captain asked.

I knew he was full of shit, yet I couldn’t help feeling that I was second place in his life. I felt played and I was jealous. I wanted to say “hey, daddy don’t marry her! You’re sixty-one years old and you have been a bachelor for a long time. You don’t need her to make you feel like a man. Besides, you have me and I am a handful!” But I held my thoughts in.

Yeah, I was still a kid. I just couldn’t picture my dad with a new wife. Was Sugar going to have a child that I had to call my sibling?

Hey, sibling, did you know your mommy raped me? Oh yes, she did. And I have proof. Do you want to watch?

“Leo please say something,” Sugar begged.

“No. No, I have nothing to say.”

With that, I turned around and walked away.

© Sally

THIS POST WAS SPONSORED BY:

DottaRaphels

 

It is true that as parents we are the architects of our children’s take on life. While many try very hard to do their best, there are still some who don’t quite make the mark.

Unfortunately the right to procreate has been given to all; as HE does not discriminate. Success in parenting the right way is determined by things way beyond commonsense. There are kids who have everything as appropriately required from the beginning, yet still get messed up.

Cruelty and betrayal are taught to us every day of our lives by both kin and strangers. I believe it’s the world we now live in. Take a look around. It’s in your face every day: reality shows, peer pressure, sports, etc. Heck, we even have motivational speakers teaching cruelty and hatred; all in the name of getting one over.

This is the new culture for young people and…

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And Then There Were Two (In Pursuit OF Kyenpia)

The worst thing that can happen to a person with a split personality is for them to switch at the wrongest time.

God does love me, as I told you, but He likes to make jokes at my own expense. Ironic is the word I’ll use to describe His love for me.

So, there I was, with Titi rambling about how Sugar set her up to implicate her and from nowhere I shut down as Daniel.

Enter: Leonel.

I found myself standing in a strange, dark room with a dead but famous man lying on the floor and one of Stella’s friends, Titilayo, I think, half naked and hyperventilating intensely. I swore under my breath as I stood there, like someone lost in a maze.

Okay, Leonel, put your thoughts together. Find your phone and retrieve your memories.

I patted my pockets and found them empty.

Where on earth am I?

“Titilayo?” I pulled off the annoying mask that was itching my face. “What is going on here?”

The moment Titilayo saw my face, she backed away and started begging. At first, I didn’t comprehend what she was saying but I heard an “I didn’t mean to” “sugar forced me” and decided that was all I needed to hear. From past experiences, I kept further questions in and held from voicing them out. I walked to the door and pulled the handle but she ran to me and stopped me.

“Please, don’t leave me here. They’ll say I killed him. I didn’t kill him. Sugar is setting me up.”

“Titilayo, it is none of my business what you’re accused of. Go and handle your shit with Sugar.” I opened the door and walked out, not knowing I had thrown away the gift God had landed on my laps. Stepping into the club and seeing everyone in a mask, I quickly slipped my mask back on and found my way out. When I met security and valet service upstairs, they handed me my phones and key to my car. I drove from the scene and parked a few buildings away from the club and switched the phones on.

“Are you serious?” I laughed when I saw the date. I had been gone five months! “Damn! Five!” I laughed again. As I drove away, I spotted an ambulance and some government vehicles heading towards the club. Deep inside me, I was curious to know what was happening but I held back and made plans to enjoy my weekend. I had been gone for too long and my body badly craved pleasures that I was certain Daniel had ignored.

The night went by in a blur. I drank a lot, danced a lot and finally, ended up at the doorstep of one of my exes. She gave me the third degree of not being a victim of Okafor’s Law when I tried to kiss her and banged the door on my face. Almost morning and scared to drive with eyes that couldn’t stay open, I dialed Rudeboy or so I thought and told him where to meet me. An hour later, a pretty girl dressed in long tees and black pantyhose came

out of a taxi and entered my car.

“Hi beautiful,” I said not knowing who the hell she was.

“Leo, you speed-dialed me, calling me Rudeboy. Didn’t you hear my voice when I was talking? Do I sound like a rude boy to you?”

“Take me home,” I murmured. “Thanks for coming,” I crawled to the backseat and she moved to take the wheels. When we got ‘home’, she left me outside, murmuring that she had to go back to sleep. I followed her, ended up at the wrong door but she pulled me into our destination and banged the door.

“What is wrong with you, Leo?! You have been acting strange since yesterday! You didn’t tell me where you were going and I have been worried!”

“Sweetheart, I just want to go to bed. When I wake up later, we will talk, okay? Where’s the bed?”

“I don’t understand you! I have tried and tried but I still don’t understand you! From the guns…”

“Guns?”

Daniel and his guns.

“To you and your fake accent, calling that radio show presenter every night and acting like a relationship expert! If you like her, go and meet her! Real men don’t have two faces! Me, I am tired and I am done! By Monday, I am out of here before somebody will come and kill me! I can’t handle it again, abeg! It was nice knowing you but it is over!”

“Right now, we’re not on the same wavelength. I’m about to zone out and I am very sorry for any BS I have put you through but can you stop talking so I can go to bed?”

“You’re a nice person but you can be better, Leo. Apart from that, you’re crazy, mentally unbalanced and you need serious help!”

Story of my life!

“Bed, please!”

She turned around and found her way to her bedroom. I followed her but on my way, found a room that looked like something I could sleep in. I wasted no time diving on the bed and passing out.

I woke up so many hours later, staring up at the ceiling. It was dark outside and so was the strange room I was in. The bed was mean to my back because the matress had gone flat from seeing better days; there was also, under my head, a pillow smelling of clamminess and a tincture of a perfume I had stopped using years ago. Daniel’s perfume.

I closed my eyes again, feeling for a bottle of brandy beside me. I pushed it to my lips and let the liquor fill me. I didn’t want to wake up now. Sleep was sweet. Dreams were better. Living in the past was bliss. I wanted bliss. So I went back to sleep and back to the place I called home so many years ago….

I found my mom in the kitchen, slicing a large piece of cake for some girls to take home to their father. She brought out a bottle of wine from the store and handed it to the girls’ mother. Both mothers smiled at each other and I secretly pinched one of the girls in a place I shouldn’t and she shrieked. I ran out of the kitchen and she ran after me. I let her catch me so I would pinch her again on her bum. I had seen the captain do it to his girlfriend so many times and she seemed to like it. My mom never liked it. She always gave him that nasty stare like the one she was giving me now. I pulled away from the girl and she also moved from me with her head bent. Her mother shook her head at her with an embarrassing smile and made her way to the front door. They were leaving. They were the last guests at our birthday party—my twin brother and I. My mom accompanied them out and I busied myself with bursting the decorative birthday balloons with a penknife someone had given me as a gift…

I should have woken up then but I couldn’t. Daniel was holding me bound in that dream. He wanted me to remember; he wanted us to remember and I didn’t know why.

My mom returned. She shut the front door and looked at my twin brother, David, who was wheezing badly. His asthmatic attacks had returned from nowhere. She signed to him to use his inhaler and he did. (My mom was a mute; she never spoke a word in her life).

“I want to sleep,” David hiccupped. “I’m tired.”

She took his hand and as they headed for the bedroom, she gestured that I stopped with the balloons but I ignored her. When she disappeared with David, the captain came in through the front door.

“Birthday boy!” he exclaimed and I ran to him excitedly and gave him a very firm handshake. I could smell Aunty Judith (his girlfriend) on him. She always smelled of onions and strong perfume and I hated that smell. I flashed the penknife in my hand at the captain’s face.

“Daddy, see my knife! Somebody gave me as a present. Is like your own!”

“Who gave you?”

“I don’t know. No name on the wrapper.”

He took the penknife and studied it with expert eyes. “This is not a bad present.” He smiled at me, “I got it for you.”

“You? Thank you!”

He pat my head and handed the knife back. I showed him some very expert moves with it and he was impressed. “Don’t let your mother see you do that. Where is she?”

“Who?”

“Your mother… Hey, stop playing with the knife.”

I still wasn’t listening, so he took the knife from me and intentionally made a cut in my palm. I grabbed and pulled my hand back. I opened my mouth to cry out but his eyes diced through mine and instantly  I shut my mouth and bit my lips instead.

“Let’s go and treat it.” He pulled me into the kitchen and produced a bottle of brandy from the top of the kitchen cabinet. Looking into my eyes, he grabbed my hand and poured the burning liquid over the wound. I felt the stinging pain but dared not show it. His eyes were smoldering spikes burning into my resolve and eventually, I steadied my breathing and calmed my nerves to give him a steady stare.

“That’s good, Spirit. Now…”

He put the bottle to my mouth and my mom walked in. She slowed down when she noticed what he was doing but hid her anger from me. I continued drinking the alcohol, avoiding her eyes.

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Continue reading And Then There Were Two (In Pursuit OF Kyenpia)

DottaRaphels

I knew you before the beginning of time
When embers from the fire of creation still burned
When giant lizards and great cats roamed this earth
I knew you

When stories of miracles
Giants and angels
Traveled beyond seas and mountains
To faraway lands…in moors, deserts and hills;
My breath was upon you

Yet to be forged, spirit floating
Lips yet to form the desire of requests
I knew where you would rest
Deciding you would never be alone

I am your beginning, your center and end
I know your core, desires and apprehensions
I am the puppet master and you are my puppet
Your fears, hope and guilt;
I know: for I am always there

Foolishly you claim ownership of thoughts
Do you think circumstances define you?
I smile; remain calm and still
I am the beginning of your very thoughts
Because I am, you are

My breath is…

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John D. Long Lake

The sun is bright and beautiful. There really is nothing sad about the day. Birds chirp gladly and the trees dance to the wind. It is a perfect time to drive to the lake and spend the day with the boys. Tucked safely in the seat beside me, I think they are the loveliest things I have ever seen. Alex is only fourteen months old and Michael just turned three. Both look like their daddy. One day I will have the girl I always wanted. The one that would take my eyes, my nose, my smile and my dreams. But Alex and Michael are okay. They are my boys. They are their daddy’s boys.

I stop the car at the bank of the lake. How tranquil and deep still waters run. I long to plunge myself in just to feel the eternal calm I am beholding. It would be bliss to just let go and be free for once. I sigh, life is beautiful. How sad when the day comes and we all say goodbye. How sad and how sweet. Sometimes I am torn between the two – life and death, I mean. Like today I am torn. But I have decided to live and breathe and not let my burdens weigh me down. Instead, I will take them and plunge them into the lake. Then I will rest.

Birds still chirp, sun still shines, winds still blow…

I get into the car and gaze at my angels. They look so sweet in their sleep. I leave a kiss on both their foreheads and smile at their beautiful bare feet. My gorgeous boys!

I put the car in drive, slowly release the brakes and just like one in a trance, I watch as the car rolls forward slowly and my boys plummet into the lake. The car drifts out, then slowly sinks.

I turn around, my arms folded, my heart dead with my babies. I walk away from life and I feel my eternal death beginning. I know what I must tell the world. Nine days long, I will hide the truth. I will lie about what truly happened today at John D. Long Lake

*****************************************************************************************

Is the love of a mother for her children overrated? Is there a love that surpasses that?

Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.

Isaiah 49 vs 15

I don’t know what would push a mother to kill the children she bore. The above story was an attempt to get into her head but I think I failed woefully. It still makes no sense to me.

On October 25, 1994, Smith initially reported to police that she had been carjacked by an African-American man who drove away with her sons still in the car. She made tearful pleas on television for the rescue and return of her children. A Usenet chain letter circulated in the following days, asking Internet users to be on the lookout for the vehicle.However, following an intensive, heavily publicized investigation and a nationwide search, Smith confessed nine days later on November 3 to letting her 1990 Mazda Protégé roll into nearby John D. Long Lake drowning her children inside. She allegedly wanted to discard her children so that she might resume an affair with a wealthy local man who had no interest in a “ready-made” family. (read the rest of the story in http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_Smith)